New Target Ad Targets Gun Owners

Retail giant Target, in the midst of an open carry controversy, recently sided with Open Carry advocates by releasing a new ad that targets their right to carry assault rifles in the store.

"We are called 'Target' after all," said Target spokesperson, Mary Spider.  "We want all people to feel welcome in our stores.  And having heavily armed people just makes us all a little bit safer.  You can buy your diapers knowing that Target is the safest store in the United States."

Check out the ad below.

Target: The Safest Place to Buy Oreos

The NRA Resurrects Bert the Turtle for New School Safety Video

Clip from "Duck, Return Fire," a new NRA-sponsored
school safety video.

In light of the recent mass shootings in America, most recently at an Oregon high school, the National Rifle Association has teamed up with the U.S. Civil Defense to educate Americans on what must be done to end the violence.  The solution, of course, is more guns.  Arm the children, says the NRA.

The NRA decided to bring back Bert the Turtle from the old 1951 Civil Defense film.  Bert is a lovable turtle who saved countless lives during the Cold War by teaching the "Duck and Cover" drills.

"It was Bert the Turtle who won the Cold War," said Wayne LaPierre at a recent press conference. "Now, Bert is going to help us win the war against bad guys with guns."

Instead of telling students to duck and cover, Bert now tells them to "duck and return fire."  It's a great plan that can only lead to success.  Check out the video below.